“I have sulked or snapped or sneered or snubbed or stormed. And the excuse that immediately springs to my mind is that the provocation was so sudden and unexpected: I was caught off my guard, I had not time to collect myself. Now that may be an extenuating circumstance as regards those particular acts: they would obviously be worse if they had been deliberate and premeditated. On the other hand, surely what a man does when he is taken off his guard is the best evidence for what sort of man he is? Surely what pops out before the man has time to put on a disguise is the truth? If there are rats in a cellar you are most likely to see them if you go in very suddenly. But the suddenness does not create the rats: it only prevents them from hiding. In the same way the suddenness of the provocation does not make me an ill-tempered man: it only shows me what an ill-tempered man I am. The rats are always there in the cellar, but if you go in shouting and noisily they will have take cover before you switch on the light.”
- C.S. Lewis [Mere Christianity]
This depiction of man’s nasty-first-instincts called to mind a certain situation I found myself in last semester. I was walking the streets with a friend when two student-aged males approached us. One immediately blocked my path, shoved a paper in my face, and demanded me to “save a starving child!” Irritated by his abrasive method, I attempted to go around him, but he just moved in my way again and grabbed my arm. I then found myself physically pushing him out of my path. This did not deter him. What ensued was a heated ten-minute debate about whether or not he was “justified” in physically stopping me, and following me down the street, in order to save a child’s life (as he reasoned). I assured him that he was not, and made sure to inform him that his methods were deplorable, offensive, and extremely lacking in tact. He then accused me of being a cold-hearted, selfish human being who needed to be more sacrificial of her time and money. The truth is, if I had been approached in a more polite matter, I would have reacted an entirely different way. Even if I did not want to donate my money to the cause, I would have been much more graceful in the way in which I explained myself. However, that was not the case. I was so shocked by this guy’s forward behavior, that I didn’t even bother masking my irritation. Instead I proceeded to get into a circular fight with a stranger in which we both aggressively justified ourselves. The rat illustration made me wonder how much of my life consisted of me wearing a mask and hiding my initial reactions to things. This example may be a little bit extreme, but it certainly was a situation in which I found myself fully expressing my unpleasant feelings in a way I haven’t done in a looong time. On a side note: Who the heck thinks aggressively chasing people down the street is the way to get them to give to charity? I’d definitely like to meet this man again and give him some advice.
Filed under: Quote(s)
Interesting quote by Leon Uris, one of my favorite fiction authors. I believe this concept can be applied to other areas of life as well. What is the balance?
“This was what I came to find. The conquest of loneliness was the missing link that was, one day, going to make a decent novelist out of me. If you are out here and cannot close off the loves and hates of all that back there in the real world, the memories will overtake you and swamp you and wilt your tenacity. Tenacity, stamina… close off to everything and everyone but your writing. That’s the bloody price. I don’t know, maybe it’s some kind of ultimate selfishness. Maybe it’s part of the killer instinct. Unless you can stash away and bury thoughts of your greatest love, you cannot sustain the kind of concentration that breaks most men trying to write a book over a three- or four-year period.”
- Leon Uris [Mitla Pass, 1988]
In two months it will be a year since I last set foot in Israel. I impetuously took a semester off college so I could live in the north, participating in a five month ulpan program. It turned out to be more of a giant party than anything. A party with loose guidelines: work, study Hebrew for a few hours, live like there’s no tomorrow, crash, repeat. As long as you made it to work and class on time (and didn’t trash any rooms in a drunken, drugged rage) you were golden. Put a group of free-spirited, college-aged students from all over the world together (in close living quarters) and you have one eclectic mess. I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything. I definitely saw a different side of Israel. The side that tourists aren’t exposed to, and religious groups stay away from. The “in-transit” side, I like to call it. Aimless young adults find meaning and purpose in The Land. They choose to make aliyah and join the army. Many learn for the first time what “Zionism” is, and become part of the glue that holds Israel together.
I made connections with a few families outside of Haifa, and this allowed me to escape the bubble of kibbutz life now and then. Although I must say, I envy those who experienced their childhood on a kibbutz. The creative juices seem to flow much deeper in the kibbutznik youth. I watched as children ran around, climbed on top of bomb shelters (that double as playgrounds), and played hide and seek with their friends long past dark. In a Land that is under constant threat and perpetual conflict, I experienced more freedom and camaraderie than I’d ever experienced in my life.
During the last month of my stay, I went on a short trip with a couple of people. We traveled to a moshav in the Golan Heights where one of my friends was from. I felt like I was in a dream. The weather was beautiful, just starting to get a little cooler, and the hills were so empty and quiet. We went to a closed portion of the Kinneret and spent the day there, only briefly interrupted once by a jeep full of soldiers looking for their base.
We had taken off early in the morning after a delicious breakfast of crepes. Our first ride (to the Kinneret) didn’t talk much, but Eddie Veder’s “Hard Sun” came on as we wound down the hills to the Lake. I found this ironic as I had played that song over and over after watching “Into the Wild.” Something about it always tugged at my heartstrings. And now I was hitchhiking for the first time, listening to that very song as I stared out the window at the splendor that is Israel. Couldn’t get any better. At the close of the day we managed to snag a ride down the mountain and back into the city. Not many people were on the roads, so we took what we got: a young guy with so much mud on his tires they wouldn’t even spin. After about fifteen minutes of attempting to scrape the mud off, he left us sitting at a bus stop while he sputtered home to get more help. Problem solved, he returned, and we made our way south again and listened to “America” by Simon & Garfunkel on the CD he had burned.
A week later I left the kibbutz and returned to the Tel-Aviv area with a family friend. I spent my last few days in Israel walking around, drinking lots of “cafeh,” and soaking up as much of the atmosphere as I could. I departed from Ben-Gurion airport before the sun rose. I flew to Amsterdam, ran to my connecting flight, and endured the final stretch back to cloudy, snowy Detroit. It was over and I didn’t know what to do with myself. I had just recently been accepted to a school in Chicago, and it started up in a month. That’s where I find myself today. Now all I do is reminisce and think about all the things I wish I had done differently. I know I’ll go back eventually. I’m not really sure what the point of this blog post is. It’s been forever since I’ve written anything, and I am an epic failure at organizing my thoughts in any coherent manner as of late. I’m at that awkward phase of life again. The “in-transit” phase. I don’t know what I’m doing or where I’m going. But I have to do something. So I do.
More to come. I think?
Filed under: Israel
STATEMENT BY CONFERENCE OF PRESIDENTS CHAIRMAN ALAN SOLOW AND EXECUTIVE VICE CHAIRMAN MALCOLM HOENLEIN ON ISSUES RAISED REGARDING CONSTRUCTION IN JERUSALEM
New York, July 21, 2009 … The Conference of Presidents of Major American Jewish Organizations has long advocated and supported the unity of Jerusalem, the capital of the State of Israel. As such, we believe that legal construction by residents of the city should be allowed as long as it is in keeping with the standards and requirements of the municipality and the national government. We find disturbing the objections raised to the proposed construction of residential units on property that was legally purchased and approved by the appropriate authorities. The area in question houses major Israeli governmental agencies, including the national police headquarters. The United States has in the past and recently raised objections to the removal of illegal structures built by Arabs in eastern Jerusalem even though they were built in violation of zoning and other requirements often on usurped land. In addition to the Jewish housing, the project called for apartment units for Arabs as well.
It is particularly significant that the structure in question formerly was the house of the infamous Mufti of Jerusalem Haj Amin al-Husseni who spent the war years in Berlin as a close ally of Hitler, aiding and abetting the Nazi extermination of Jews. He was also linked to the 1929 massacre in Hebron and other acts of incitement that resulted in deaths and destruction in what was then Palestine. There has been an expressed desire by some Palestinians to preserve the building as a tribute to Husseini.
As a united city, Jerusalem’s Jewish and Arab residents should be permitted to reside wherever legal and security requirements allow. Hundreds of Arab families have moved into Jewish neighborhoods of Jerusalem and the same right should be accorded to Jewish residents in live where they choose in Jerusalem. To do otherwise would undermine and prejudge the status of the city.
No government of Israel has or can pursue a discriminatory policy that would prevent the legitimate presence of Jews in any area of its capital.
I found this picture and caption, featured on Jerusalem Post, to be absolutely hilarious. Completely laugh-worthy. Seriously, read the caption. I almost spit my toast out at the computer screen. It’s that ridiculous.
“Lebanon’s top Shiite cleric Grand Ayatollah Mohammed Hussein Fadlallah, right, hands his book “Islam, the religion of dialogue,” to former US President Jimmy Carter, left, in Beirut’s southern suburbs of Dahiyeh, Lebanon.”
Yeah, pretty cute. Anyway…
This weekend Carter is meeting with an official of the Yesha Council of Settlement – Shaul Goldstein – to speak about freezing Israeli settlements in the West Bank. He also will be meeting with various leaders of the Eastern world, including Mahmoud Abbas, Salam Fayyad, and Shimon Peres. Today Carter is scheduled to meet Syrian President Bashar Assad. This guy gets around.
Classically enough, good old Jimmy will be hanging with Hamas while in the area. Official sources state that Hamas is planning to ask Carter to “pressure Israel” in regard to the settlement “issue.” This is not the first time Carter has acted as a mouthpiece for Hamas. Man, Carter, you’re pretty much taking on a spokesperson position for a terrorist group. Why don’t you just make it official already?
